Come try our new product
It’s the best you’ve ever seen
A miraculous invention
Who can guess what it’ll be
At our new line ups unveiling,
We ask you be polite
For our product is a little bit shy
For we have built you a friend (A friend!)
A most comforting friend (Oh that's great!)
For those nights when you are feeling all alone
(I'm so lonely these days)
He’ll hug you when you cry (Huzzah!)
And he’ll never say goodbye
And if he does, (wait what?)
Well that’s what the off buttons for!
Now customers, don’t go away (why?)
For we’ll make it worth your while today
To forget your lonely, empty lives
And make a purchase of this size
For 25 thousand he’ll say your name
In every personal message you make (seems pricy)
For 20 hundred he’ll wave hello (what a deal!)
And for 200 our invisible model will go!
We have built you a friend (A friend!)
A most dazzling friend (Oh that's great!)
In our upgrade he can juggle and sing songs (Oh that's amazing!)
He’ll tell you he loves you
Even if you know it’s not true
A hollow replica of your boyfriend who is gone
He can sing!
He can dance! (tap, ballet, and jazz!)
Higher that anyone he can... jump, I don't know is that marketable?
He’s like a famous celebrity
Almost real
That is until you have to fill him up at a gas pump
(That's a problem we're currently working out, it's weird, we know)
We have built you a friend (A friend!)
A most comforting friend (Oh that's great!)
For those nights when you are feeling all alone
If he starts to ask questions
Like “why do i exist?”
"Who created me?"
"What even is my purpose if not to fill a lonely consumerists soul and make them think that even for a second someone who likes them could be bought with money?” (that's rough buddy)
Well that’s what the off buttons for.
Thank you for your purchase
credits
from Too Afraid to Say It,
released April 1, 2017
Mastered by Tim Flynn at AudioWall Studios
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